I always wanted to be a singer

So, I am no musician at all. I wish I was. I can't read it, I don't sing (at least not if there's anyone else around). I love it, but I don't have an ear for it. My partner is a beautiful musician. He has a gravelly voice like Tom Waits, and people also usually mention Bruce in the same breath. He also writes music and lyrics. They seem to flow through him effortlessly. I don't understand what a chord is, or anything about scales. BUT, being with him has opened up a longing to somehow, some day write lyrics for a song for him to sing. I've had one attempt so far. A song called "Laura" is still a work in progress. He has never gotten all the lyrics down first without having the music, so we're adjusting. When I try to write the lyrics, I can hear his gravelly voice, but it's also frustrating because I don't have a way to express it in the language of music.

Below is my second attempt, hot off the press. I really have no idea what I'm doing. I should probably do some research at some point. I don't know how much you're supposed to rhyme! My writing doesn't usually. Anyway, I am sharing this here for a few reasons 1) It is unfinished and that means it's scary to share. I want to keep this one loose, tho, so that changes can easily be made. I was rigid with "Laura." 2) I've just emailed it to him, but he hasn't seen it yet. I want to give it some of its own space, in its own right, especially if it gets rejected as a song. 3) If there is song potential in it, it's very likely it will get stripped down and reworked and will look nothing like it does now. I want to remember what it once was and where it started. And, if there's not song potential in it, well, then it will still have a place to rest. 4) To honor the process of learning how to do something different. 5) To honor the process of collaboration and each person's part in it.

I always wanted to be a singer

to bare my soul on stage

for you to feel my power linger

long after the lights fade

I longed to move you like the ocean

to crack hearts open with a note

I needed you to see me

and want me for your own

But I am no great beauty, and my star was always dim

I am rusty and I'm broken

All gravel and I'm grim

So you'll have to listen closer

to hear my aching song

It's worth it in the whisper

You can tell me if I'm wrong

My gift is not the music

It's not coming through my voice

It's in the sound of reeds instead

blowing in the wind

It's in the way the water breaks

every time the tide moves in

My voice is spread around the earth

and buried deep within

It's in the way my heart beats fast

every time I catch your eye

So listen close next time

you're under the night sky

You'll hear me in the stars above

I'll wrap you up in gravity, and take you for a ride

I always wanted to be a singer

to bare my soul on stage

for you to feel my power linger

long after the lights fade

But I am no great beauty, and my star was always dim

I am rusty and I'm broken

All gravel, and I'm grim

So you'll have to listen closer

to hear my aching song

It's worth it in the whisper

You can tell me if I'm wrong